Thursday, March 15, 2007

Fading out of the background

That's right, out of the background, not into the background.

This morning I woke up and felt like my life was in focus again. No more living in a blur. I love it!!

It's strange to say, but for the past little while I've really felt detached from my own life. I guess it was mostly because I had to rely so entirely on other people to do pretty much everything and while that has been steadily decreasing since sometime in December, it has taken a while to feel like I'm in charge of my life again. Not that someone else was ever "in charge," but now when I decide I'd like a glass of water, I can get up and get a glass of water. It sounds so simple, but it's amazing what a difference that little bit of independence makes.

Going back to work, even just part time, was a big milestone. I like having a regular routine (if there's anything regular about my routine). I still get weird looks when I get up in the middle of a meeting and start pacing around the room, but I can deal with weird looks better than I can deal with pain! One day soon I hope to graduate from a few hours a day in the office and then the rest at home to full days at the office. I've tried that twice and both time the results were less than desirable...aches and exhaustion...I think I'll wait a bit before I try that again!

Now that the focus is back and the background is where it belongs, in the background, I'm ready to get on with stuff. Trips to plan, household items to buy (we're finally getting a microwave!!!!!), people to see...all good!

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